fed on the sorry left-overs of

The author - click here to investigate
An Abridged History - click here to investigate
A Handbook of Volapük - click here to investigate
Elephantina - click here to investigate
Novgorod - click here to investigate
Scribbling Stories - click here to investigate


(if there is some, it's rarely good)




New!! Old post-Scottish Referendum Fantasy!!
Mots of us have yet to come to terms with the result of the Great Scottish Independence Referendum. Here's a tale, though, which might cheer you up, whichever way you were disappointed: Brigadoon, Ostriches, Fairytale characters and the Referendum, all jumbled up and presented in readable format... or indeed (for the more adventurous types) in Kindle format.

New!! Postscript!!
I signed a contract with the publishers of an excellent series of short-story anthologies, Postcripts. I have written three longish short stories set in the early 20th century, each dealing with an historical matter which almost certainly has been puzzling you for some time. The third of these has now appeared. Visit the Postscripts web-site to discover more about these anthologies(specifically Volumes 26/27 and 30/31 or look at the index for the most recent volume.

New!! More stories for January!!
I've put some more short stories on my Stories page (so where else would I put them?). They provide a meaningful context to management-speak. Click here to have a rummage about...
For the Turkey-lovers amongst you, a collection of their chronicles is now available in paperback. Most excellent for funerals, children's birthday-parties and Autumnal colds.

Trump it no more!
Times are hard. I've been obliged to sub-let some of this web-site to an annoying neighbour who insists on writing stuff about The Mighty Trump Organisation. Much against my better judgement, I've let him sleep here for a month or two. The arrangement can be terminated at any time. Click here to see what he has to say for himself.

Photograph of Mr David Kininmonth, an elderly relative of the author - press his nose to read more about his young descendant
Depressed? I'll give you depressed...

My mentor, Mr Kininmonth (the elder) ...
...politely requests that you leave this site - and the rest of our fragile planet - as tidy as (or tidier than) you found it; but, as in the matters of the rising price of snuff and the declining standard of pickled herring, is resigned to disappointment...

Alas! Mr. Kininmonth, you look how I sometimes feel -
why? Click here to find out more, if you dare.

And other stuff...
I've put a load of old other stuff on my Other Stuff page. Click here to check that you've missed nothing at all.

"No Blanket - a Great Oversight in a Siberian Winter" Cover of Novgorod the Great - click to read about it
  • Novgorod the Great The paths of two lonely travellers cross in the ancient and run-down Russian city of Novgorod the Great. It is 1833, and the last huzzahs of the Napoleonic Wars still echo back and forth across Europe, South America and Russia. When the two travellers are invited to keep an old man company on his short approach to death's door, they pass a night of reminiscence - their own, the old man's, his nurse's and those of a supporting cast (whose members are not always alive). Here, you can read of lusty troubadours, South American elephants, squirrels, rhubarb and, not least, pickled eggs. Read more ...

  • I was interviewed by the Dundee Courier at the time of publication (May 2008) of this short novel. The full-page spread was printed under the banner headline The Elephant Man... Elephantina: a tale of elephants and posterity...
  • Elephantina
    Just outside Dundee, in April 1706, an elephant sighs forlornly, topples over, and drowns in a ditch by the side of the road from Broughty Ferry. Foiling almost all the energetic attempts of the citizenry to make off with large chunks of meat and other elephantine trophies, local surgeon, botanist and anatomist Dr Patrick Blair embarks on a mission to be the first in Britain to dissect an elephant and to complete a pioneering scientific study of the dead animal's internal organs and skeleton. Read more ...

  • I am delighted to learn from a respected linguist in the Netherlands that an article has been created about me in the Volapük version of Wikipedia: click here to read it... Cover of A Handbook of Volapük - click to read about it
  • A Handbook of Volapük
    In April 1891, two matters greatly excite the inhabitants of Edinburgh: the decennial Population Census; and the Annual General Meeting of the Edinburgh Society for the Propagation of a Universal Language. The General Secretary of this Society, Mr. Justice, is a militant champion of the highly-popular language "Volapük"; but he is locked in a battle for ascendancy with Dr. Bosman, shameless apologist for "Esperanto". Read more ...

  • This novel was short-listed for the 2004 Saltire Prize for the First Book of the Year.
    Cover of An Abridged History - click to read about it
  • An Abridged History
    This tells, for the first and last time, the story of the construction of a railway-line between Garve and Ullapool in the north of Scotland. The hero, Alexander Auchmuty Seth Kininmonth, has dreams of finding personal happiness, fame and fortune on this project. Alas, he finds that the combined forces of a Scottish climate, ignoble finance-capital and an assortment of feuding millennarians conspire against him. Read more ...

  • The original idea for my story about Big Horace and his tie collection came from a stray email from Belgium; now, however, the most excellent Museum of Corporate Neckties (late of California, now expanding into Arizona) has adopted Big Horace: their site rewards a visit... We hope for further sponsorship in these straitened times! Scribbling stories: unpublished gems and otherwise from the home of oddities... Take a few minutes to read some of my unpublished stories. They have been accumulating for several decades. Some are well past their use-by date, others should never have had a use-by date in the first place. But - what do I care? - I'm paying for this web-site, not you, so why shouldn't I?
    Read more

    Copyrights: All stories and book extracts appearing on this site
    © Andrew Drummond 2006-2015.
    Photos of the author taken by Graham Clark.
    The usual Disclaimers: all the stories and extracts offered here are accessible only as Adobe Acrobat PDF files.
    Most computers can read these files, but - if yours cannot - you can download Adobe Acrobat Reader from the usual web-sites.
    Any links to external sites will be checked by me regularly.
    But I cannot guarantee they will work all the time...